Monday, 18 June 2018

My feelings


      This laptop really ruined my mood. I have to keep more money to buy a new one... Cannot bear with this laptop anymore... Tooooo much...

           Okay, selamat hari raya everyone. Since I am at home, so have wifi i can write this blog. Okay.. cam biasa laaa... Alhamdulillah... tahun ni dapat celebrate raya with family. Tahun nie nie mmg a lot of different laa kan ... Ramadan aku pun tahun nie very different buka puasa merata2 not like usual. Few times with sl1m friends at padang perbadanan, few times at surau presint 16, at media prima office fariha also and many more yg penting not with pjh staff yg berlagak tu.. 

             Alhamdulillah Allah granted me with the 19 sl1m friends that are really awesome.. They helped me a lot. Before this I was alone there but now alhamdulillah I have friends. I love all of them. Even at office and rumah sewa quite unhappy, I have them to make me smile.. Bukan laa nk puji lebih2 but there I only have them... To salsabila thank you very much be my kakak. When I already rapat with someone then they'll know how I am.. I'm not laa cannot berdikari i don't know laa but that's my behavior. Even with my siblings pun people will say that I am adik. My perangai really not like a kakak. If I go shopping, I cannot go alone, I don't buy. I need to ask their opinion, asked those who accompany me to ask the seller and many more... Thanks sgt salsabila teman kite jogging juga... hopefully dpt teruskan.. Tapi sara, mira and nufa ajak pindah rumah. nk duduk sama2. I wanna go out from the house because that kakak very berkira... I cannot stand. I just learn duduk rumah sewa. I am not used to it. Before ni mahallah kat uia lain... bertimbang rasa laa sikit.. apa salahnya masak kalau balik awal. ni x tnggu juga aku yg balik lmbt utk masak... adoyyaiii.. entahlaaa.

          Sara and Atirah always tumpagkan I. Thank you sngt. Mila ajar kite mcm2. Yg lain pun.. thank you bnyk sgt tlg.. After nie x tau laa bila lg boleh jumpa... Time raya ni pun semua dh krik2. Nnti dh abis sl1m lg laa krik2... rindunya kt korang. Sedih sgt2 x dpt bergambar dgn korg masa hari rabu b4 raya tuuuu... 

               Hmmm what else.. To everyone that I made mistakes please forgive me. To my family .. lagi laaa thank you sgt2. Mmg x terbalas jasa ... love all of you... semua org syg family... jodoh tu rahsia Allah. Allah will give on the right time at the right place... Yg pnting jgnla nak main2kan hati org yeee... nak ckp nak x nak ckp x nak.. serious laa sikit bnda camni jgn nk main 2 bg hrapan palsu... 

     Okayy byee

Gambar raya tahun lepas ... hehe .. 

Sunday, 3 June 2018

Luahan Perasaan


      So today.. I wanna tell everything that i felt. Since en. sazali who is our trainer for classroom training said that women will feel relieve or release when they express all their problems. They just wanna be listened then they can find solution on their own. 

      Lets get started. The world of working is not as good as study life. It is totally different. I feel like wanna give up already. Now I worked as sl1m trainee at PjH. During our classroom training, everyday is fun you know like going to class even we have to do presentations all the time... Now we already finished our training and have to go to office to work. I realllllllly don't like it. For me I feel like they are quite berlagak laaa. I don't know laa if only me feels like that. However, my friends also said like that. I thought atirah pnye department je yg x kerek. Yg aku nie... ya ampun.... harapnye x de lah org pjh baca ea... entahlaa i don't know until when i can stay at that place. I reallly determined to go out from pjh as soon as possible. Pray for me please. i wanna stay at my place jee. Nowadays it is not easy to get a job. So, I must be grateful but sgt menderitaaaaa.... hmmm nk jadi freelance je boleh x??...

       Next problem is housemate rumah sewa nie berkira sangat... this is the reality of life.. thats all laa
okayyy bye

Saturday, 7 April 2018



     .. hi semua.. In this month of April I and all of us got a lot of wedding ceremony invitation right?... Barakallahu lakuma. Semoga Allah memberkati pernikahan kalian. 

                Before we start, I would like to ask everybody especially me to start our day with grateful. Waje up in the morning say Alhamdulillah Allah still give us the chance to live to ask forgiveness from Him and increase our taqwa.

               Alhamdulillah. Last week I was very angry kan?? Allah is very kind. Allah baik. Allah sayang kita. When He gives us ujian, then it means we are very lucky. Allah bg ujian tanda Allah sayang. Allah concern with us. Kalau dengar ustaz Hanan Attaki or Ustaz Ebit liew mmg menangis laaa. X boleh nk control2 lagi. 

               Last week was quite an emotional week for me. Cry everyday... However Allah is very kind. He give me smiles. Suddenly on Saturday, Allah let me to meet my beloved sahibah uia that already graduated. Everybody has their own life and everybody was stress. Not only me okayyy. So we went to Dataran Merdeka main buih... and the one that lastik2 tu. Hilang kejap stress dpt jadi kanak2 for a while. Memang nk hilangkan stress patutnya baca Quran or listen to the bacaan ayat suci,. berzikir. However, that one also a therapy kan ?? But don,t go overboard laa..  After that we went to surau nusaibah. Katanya penat nak balik tidur. But kalau dh gather camni, bukan selalu dapat. Dekat syurga nnti boleh .. so apa lagi bersembang la  x de la membawang sangat... mungkin fikirkan masa depan... Dengan fariha yg x habis2 membuatkan semua org terhibur... Macam buat karangan bahasa melayu ayat I .. X bole blah. Last week pun best, dapat kluar mkn2 dgn fariha dan rahah cumanya rushing laa

               Minggu nie pulak, ada kawan2 baru Sl1m masuk... so I am not alone. Before this only 4 person and only me a girl so I have deal with them 3 boys laa. But now, there are 7 girls and I hope more boys are coming. Balance la sikit... okay let me tell in malay lah ea.. On Monday tu.. the two boys nie wanna meet the new girls laa kan but they arrived late, so we met at the lift je and only talk with me and at that time pun I don't know what we were talking. Dah lama x deal dgn brothers nie.. whatsapp boleh laa dpn mata x tercakap ... but now dh okay kot. On Tuesday we have jamuan otside with all finance team. So on Wed tu, we went to cafe like on Mon. Then suddenly I saw idzni. I thought it was him laaa because not really ingat sgt muka . Then, kebetulan they are looking for table. So, Atirah and me pun waved our hand calling them kan... then they pun join us makan sekali... then I knew who is hazman and idzni. Then, we pun sembang2... and quite funny laaa the dicussion... sabar je laaa... hehe... nice to meet them... 

              so, this weekend I have to finish my work. Last week Shahira, this week me pulak. Lagu maher zain yg album ada lagu Medina tu sgt mengingatkan aku pada uia ... How I miss my undergraduate life... lagu ara johari tu pulak tringat dkt tmpat intern.

      Okay... salah silap harap dimaafkan. yg baik boleh dicontohi yg buruk boleh dijauhi.
gmbar baru upload guys, so sorry x dpt nk ltk dkt blog.. budget ada org nak tengok... 

Wednesday, 21 February 2018



      I was and still sad with the lost of my pictures in my laptop.... sobs. Because of this laptop. Hmm but that was ditakdirkan for me. Every tiny simple thing also Allah dh takdirkan untuk kita. Semua benda yg jadi adalah dengan izin Allah. Tapi tak semua yang Allah izin, Allah reda. Okay I really want back the pictures At Terengganu, Raya 2016 and Kenduri kak Hanis and other kakak. Klau ada rezeki Allah izin then I'll get back the pictures. Actually I wanna share about the old pictures. I read my diary during I was in form 5. So funny and sweet. Miss my school. Even I had some bad experience there, but I still love my alma mater. Congratzzz Syahira Raghni and husband selamat bernikah semalam. 17/2/18

     I don't have many pictures during my secondary school. Boarding school cannot la use phone to take pictures. I don't have camera at that time kan... at that time not like now. That pictures was during HK means hari keusahawanan. There are part of my closest friend back in stf. They are very nice. I have nice friends, nice kakaks and nice adiks. Alhamdulillah. I knew all of you also have very nice friend. The pictures during our dinner also I don't have. Its okay even I don't have the pictures but I have the stories in my diary. I love writings. Other than this pictures, I have pictures during at rmc. That pictures was tagged at fb. if not, I will not have laa that pictures. I upload 2 pictures only ea. I don't want people to find my blog when they type anything about stf rmc. hehehe.

This picture during eating durian. Lots of love

                      My laptop nie suka sangat buat hal and it lead to make me cry... i will continue later okayyy.

        Okay now I'm back hehe.... okay yesterday 20th February is my Mother's birthday. happy birthdayyy.
okay. so many okays... before continue to CFS and degree life, I would like to share laa kan some story.
During form 4 I joined one week trip to schools. SBT schools. Actually the journey was to the north. Along the way, we drop by to TKC, SSP. That 2 schools with STF ibarat musuh laaa. Macam x percaya gi sekolah musuh. Biasa la perempuan nie. However, that was a very great experience. The TKC ians were very kind bawak kitorang lawat blok. We have chit chat and everything. Next we went to SSP. There , I met my dua pupu okay bukan dua lipa. hehe. Hazirah. Then we pun chit chat laa. Okay.. after that I forgot. Because we were going to Sekolah Sains Sultan Md Jiwa. I don't know the right spelling but we bergerak keluar dari ssp tu dh lps maghrib juga or nk dkt isyak dah which I mean already night. At SSMJ pun i had friends from primary schools but all are boys. so, x jumpa pun dgn dorg just asking the girl students. Then form 5 I went to RMC because we have eksplorasi. So... nice memories.


     During CFS, I was very close to them. We were special unit FSCC. We were always together. Other than them, I was close with my room mates and my class mates. So, I x kenal ramai sgt org. When my room mate balik kelas petang2 kumpul kat tengah bergosip I cannot i magine who are they yg dorg tgh ckp tu.. until dh degree baru I kenal ..Ouh he /she laaa yg dorg ckp tu lol. My cfs storyes bnyk kot I shared dkt blog nie... hehe I should read back.

 These are the girls that I spent most of my time in undergraduate life. They made my undergradzz life meaningful and always be in my heart...

  That was my first and last to join my GL friends. the awesomestest. X sangka dpt join. Before nie I segan nk join. Kitorang kluar  10 org in one avanza yasmin's car... terharu dpt join dorg... walaupun segan.... thats all lah k byeeee

Sunday, 4 February 2018

Keep calm and try to improve ourselves.


          I knew I should only write something that has ibrah. I should share something beneficial but I am a normal person. I am alone. I knew the best place to share problems or to say anything is during 3/4 of night. Tell to Allah. So, we must do that okay. On Friday, I listened to Ustaz Ebit Liew. He said that we must bersangka baik dengan Allah. Actually banyak sangat benda2 yg mententuh hati. You can find Usatz Ebit liew punya ceramah at youtube as well. 

          Before I forget, today, 4/2/18 is Fayyad's birthday. Fayyad is kak Farah's son. He is 1 year old today. He is so cuteeeee. Teringat dekat babies dkt uia. So, I should tell happy story only right. 

          Okay, life is complicated right. I feel like I am more comfortable in uia. What I mean is when in uia , I can go to halaqah easily. I can join program, meeting anytime. Nobody cares. But now, I have to jaga hati for both sides. They want me to join them. I am okay but at the other side, I have to explain everything to my parents. They don't understand. I cannot think of my future. Its okay .. Allah knows what is the best for me. Allah tu baik.

            During I went to uia b4 convocation, I had the chance to join sharing session before iftar. It was kak Amnani's turn. She always be called as Kak Ina. Kak Ina said, we must know the 'sirah' of Islam. The sahabat and sahabiah. So, when I arrived home, I found history book on Umar Abdul Aziz and Sultan Muhammad al Fateh. I really have to find more. We must increase our knowledge. Okay, actually I wanna share on Sultan Muhammad al Fateh. Before reading the book, I thought that Sultan Muhammad al Fateh just easily won the battle and got the Konstantinopel. However, it was not that easy. They took a long time in the battle. Many things happened and they almost putus asa. Sultan Muhammad al Fateh is a very pious man. The armies and citizen all are good and pious. Mereka sentiasa solat , mohon petunjik Allah dan akhirnya Allah bagi kemenangan untuk Sultan Muhammad Al Fateh. Jadinya, nak mendapat kejayaan tu bukan senang. Even, seorang sultan yang hebat pun Allah uji dengan bermacam dugaan sebelum nak menang. apatah lagi kita yang tak hebat nie lagi lah banyak dugaan. Allah bagi ujian tu sebab nak tingkatkan darjat kita. Sultan Muhammad al Fateh meletakkan 100% keyakinan dan kepercayaan kepada Allah. Kita pun kena buat macam tu. Kena yakin dengan Allah. Orang yang bersabar nie reward dia besar. tak disangka sangka. Actually, I wanna relate the story with my life but let me and Allah only know okayyy.... 

Jzakumullahu khairal jazak... 

Sunday, 21 January 2018

I am sorry


                    I really need to write right now. Now, my halaqah is with kak Farah Lokman. So, I never go to hq yet because i don't have transport. However, kak S stayed near to my house. So, I pm her stated that I wanna tumpang her to go to hq. Then she came just now but with her husband and her baby. So, of course I segan. Tapi suami kak S nie yg namanya abg S quite peramah. Aku bukannya nak kutuk tapi entahlaa. Suami kak S ajak saya apply jadi cikgu dkt ibrah sementara nak dapat kerja and jd keArah pnya ahli. Aku x kisah kalau ada transport. Tp aku x dak. Jauh juga laa nk ke sana. Tu laa tgh pening nie. Nnti tolak offer kata apa pulak. Mmg x baik cerita problem kat org. Tambah2 public camnie. Tapi aku stress. Aku suka jaa join program. Tp x dak transport. Lg satu program halaqah. Aku sebenarnya segan sgt dah nk tumpang kak S. Serious segan sgt. Tp aku perlu ke hq. Camna nie??? aku dh x nk tumpang... aaaaa stress.... maaf sgt. Aku tau aku x solehah. X patut citer problem kat sini. Aku cam nk stay KL lama2 sikit. 

                Okay lah nk citer bnda lain pulak. Td ada citer Kapt Mukhriz. Aku teringat time citer tu first kluar tv, kitorang tgk beramai2 dkt MO. Best sgt. Ada fariha, kak fad, kak ida. Time tu aku mmg suka sgt laa citer tu sbb kapten askar bagai nie. Aku suka sgt citer Dots tu Captain Yoo Si Jin and the gang. Dulu selalu melepak MO. Buka puasa sama2. rindu undergradsss. Nnti  ada citer budak boy. tp dkr rmc baru. x best laa x de kenangan. Kenangan semua dkt rmc lama. Tp bagus juga sbb aku mmg x nak ingat pun semua kenangan tu...  tu je yee utk kali nie. X de bnda menarik ... x dpt nk sebarkan dakwah. Maaf ye.


Wednesday, 17 January 2018



     Alhamdulillah. Today I am really feel better. I just recover from my flu and fever. This is quite bad laa sepanjang hidup. Almost one week juga laa. I insist my brother to go to pharmacy to buy medicine for me. Mmg x boleh tidur  on the first day tu. Selalunya I got fever for only one day and not that bad. This time quite bad la. However, tetap kena bersyukur. Sakit tu kan penghapus dosa. Semua nya temporary kat dunia nie. Alhamdulillah skrg dh getting better cuma batuk nie belum fully recovered. Mungkin sbb haritu kan cuaca sejuk kan? tu yg temperature berubah. Cuaca sejuk ke panas ke semua tu asbab je. Allah dah memang mengtakdirkan aku untuk demam kan.. Semua berlaku dgn izin Allah. 

       Tadi rasa macam ada banyak benda nak tulis tapi sekarang dah tak ingat . Bila sakit nie baru lah kita appreciate nikmat sihat. Jagalah kesihatan masing2 yaaa. Put your trust in Allah. It is not just word of wisdom. Have to walk the talk. Boleh dengar ustaz Hanan Attaki dkt you tube. Best sangat. Actually I miss my solehah girls. Aku tak berani nak tegur sbb dorg tu busy. saya nie siapa laa kan ? Fariha skrg kwn dgn syuhada dan org2 kl je.. ye lah dh bekerjaya mana ingat saya lagi. hehe x de lah fariha baik, maafkan saya.... 

       on 7th January 2018, I already 24. Thank you. Jazakumullahu khair jazak kepada semua yang wish dan doakan saya.... lots of love.